Snow, Sex, & Silence

Ok..... Lets tackle a subject that most people try to avoid. Let's talk about sex.... I think the winter months make this topic especially relevant because people are less inclined to go out and play and more inclined to "stay in, and play". The fact remains that sex is a very human desire that can be equally beautiful and destructive.

When I look at snow, I see beauty. As it appears out of thin air, and falls to the ground, the miracle of its creation is evident to everyone around. However, I also see its weight. As it falls and builds up on the ground, it's beauty can easily become problematic, especially in places where it doesn't belong. In my eyes, sex and snow have a lot in common. Unfortunately, there is a lot of shame around sex, especially for Christians. We think that sex is only a problem for singles, and can easily be cured through marriage. The reality is, that sex has many forms of destruction. Sex before marriage can be damaging. Sex outside of marriage can be decapitating, and being in a sexless marriage is down right disturbing. (sorry, that's just my personal opinion..lol)

So, lets clear the air.

We all know the scriptures, so I wont bore you by harping on the obvious. What we don't easily talk about, is how a person can practically follow these convictions. Saying, "No sex before marriage"..is easy but how does a person maintain this desire. I'm no expert, but I think looking at sex as more than just an isolated act helps me see the significance. Whenever you open yourself to a person who is not your significant other, you open yourself to share in whatever burden is afflicting them. Back in my day they called it soul ties. Soul ties look a lot like an STD, invisibly transferred, seemingly easy to receive, but hard to get rid of. These invisible connections can torture a person or make them do completely irrational things.

I wont lie and say that there is one clear path to avoid sexual indiscretions, but I think removing the shame, and talking about it with people who are also attempting to avoid destruction helps. The worst thing a person can do is suffer in silence. We often want the world to think we don't have the same struggles, but the reality is that the life of a believer has a magnified pressure to "do the right thing". God gives us strength to endure, but the fight still has to be won.

Here are some tips that have kept me out of the fire more than once:

1. Having someone in your corner who can hold you accountable and keep you focused on your goal is crucial.

2. Giving yourself an outlet to release tension. Whether its a massage or lifting weights, having an outlet is needed.

3. Go to Church! I might just end every blog with this tip...Church is not just a place to show off your new shoes. It's a place that recharges you. All week you are in places that don't have a primary function of worshipping God. Being in a space that is dedicated to worship is not only a symbolic act, but a physical conditioning to refocus your mind.

4. Avoid temptation...easier said than done, but putting yourself in compromising positions only increases your likelihood of failure. As innocent as a Netflix & Chill sounds, its likely to get you in trouble.

I haven't perfected this thing, so feel free to leave some tips that work for you below. This walk isn't easy, but doing it with others can be helpful...