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It is...What It Is...

Sometimes the hardest things to let go of, are the things that are out of your control. I think most of us would prefer to think that we can accomplish anything we put our mind to. In most cases, this can be true. But in some, it couldn't be the furthest from it. For the eternal optimist, this concept is even harder to accept. The same thing that drives them to accomplish great things, also prevents them from having what should come natural. Its hard to explain but when things are truly out of your control, attempts to control it, usually make the situation worse, rather than better. Case in point, when I was married, my ex-husband was diagnosed with severe PTSD. He was a military veteran, who had seen things some people couldn't even imagine. In my optimistic attempts to help save our marriage, I wanted to try everything I could to help him. Unfortunately, trying, only made things worse. The harder we tried the worse it got. From counseling, to talking, to therapy, his anger only increased with every failed attempt. My inability to accept his diagnosable anger and his inability to change it, led us to a very unhealthy relationship. Eventually our trying, led to us separate.Today I see that our separation was for the best, but at the time acceptance seemed like failure. You see, most of us "successful people", don't like things that are unfixable. We are cocky enough to believe that if we don't have the answer, the answer has to exist somewhere.

This is, the very reason Google was created. Don't get me wrong seeking truth and solutions is not a bad idea. However, seeking answers to questions that are out of your control can result in a catastrophic situation. Have you ever forgot your password to an account, and instead of resetting it, you continue to make failed attempts? For those of you who are eternally optimistic, with a taste of cocky, this has probably happened more than once. What generally happens in those scenarios, is that, you get "locked out".

Getting "locked out" is probably the ultimate failure to an optimist. Especially when they feel as if the answer should be within reach. If you think about it, the time that was spent "locked out", could have easily been used to reset the password in the first place. But, to an optimist, reset is failure.

If you are not an optimist this is probably a very difficult concept to grasp, but if you are, you are probably nodding your head profusely right now. This next paragraph will probably sound counter intuitive considering the topic, but I think in this case sharing what I've learned might be useful to individuals that know an optimist, or happens to be one.

Here's what I've learned:

Optimist's are gifted individuals, who are needed to create change. Let's not get it twisted, if you have an optimist in your life, you probably have one of the greatest resources at your disposal. Are they also dangerous? Absolutely. There's a scripture in the Bible that says, "A man's gift maketh room for him, and bringeth him before great men." Proverbs 18:16

But why would a gift need to have room made for it??

To the average person a gift can be accepted at any time. But for an optimist, their gift of knowledge can not be accepted until mind's have been prepared to receive. This means that the mind of an optimist is always forward thinking, but if the surrounding area is stagnant, their forward movement, will be met with hard impacts. Some impacts, causing more harm than good.

The moral of the story is, when things are out of your control, trust that it was never meant for you to control it. Focus on what is in front of you, and allow time to reset things you left behind. In time, your optimistic nature will be used in places that are ready to receive it.

But this is all just my opinion. The real authority on true solutions, come from our Father in heaven. Seek Him for guidance, and allow Him to direct you into all truth and understanding.

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